“Are you really listening to me?”
This is what everyone is thinking when they are talking to you.
So how do you show that you are really listening? Do you just sit there expressionless? Or do you use active listening skills?
Active listening skills are the fundamental interpersonal skills any person can use. Without these skills you would not be effective in any relationship. There are two areas of active listening skills. The first one is probing skills, they are used to investigate and expand what the speaker has said. The second area is supporting skills; they are techniques that acknowledge what has been said.
Probing skills demonstrate your willingness to listen and shows your interest in what the person is saying. You can use open-ended questions like ‘why’, ‘when’ and ‘how’. Supporting skills reward the person meaningfully for continuing the discussion. You can use statements like; ‘I agree with you.” or ‘I can feel your pain.’
When you start using these techniques you will begin to see the positive impact it will have on those you are speaking with.
When can you begin to improve your active listening skills?
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